A Holiday Practice of Gratitude (and a Grounded New Year)
“Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.” — Epicurus
The holiday season has a way of turning up the volume on everything. Joy feels brighter. Loneliness can feel sharper. Gratitude comes easily for some—and for others, it’s complicated, tender, even bittersweet. Add end-of-year reflection and New Year’s goals, and it’s easy to get caught in a loop of “not enough.” Not enough time. Not enough peace. Not enough progress. Not enough closeness. Not enough energy.
Epicurus offers a different path—one that feels surprisingly modern: Don’t spoil what you have by fixating on what you don’t. That doesn’t mean we stop growing or dreaming. It means we learn to hold ambition in one hand and appreciation in the other.
At Desert Peace Therapy, we often think of this as a simple, powerful shift:
We can honor what’s missing without missing what’s here.
The holiday “comparison trap” (and why it hits so hard)
During the holidays, we’re surrounded by highlight reels—family photos, gift lists, travel plans, end-of-year wins. Even when life is good, comparison can quietly drain it of sweetness.
You might notice thoughts like:
- “Everyone else seems happier than I am.”
- “I should be further along by now.”
- “If I could just fix this one thing, I’d finally feel okay.”
These thoughts are incredibly common. They’re also exhausting. And they pull us away from the small, real moments of goodness that are actually available—today.
Gratitude isn’t about pretending everything is perfect. It’s about strengthening our ability to notice what’s true and what’s good, at the same time.
A more honest version of gratitude
Sometimes gratitude gets presented like a forced smile: “Just be thankful!” But real gratitude is steadier than that. It can coexist with grief, stress, and uncertainty.
You can be grateful and still:
- miss someone deeply,
- feel overwhelmed,
- struggle with anxiety,
- want change,
- feel unsure about the next chapter.
In therapy, we often practice both/and thinking:
- “This year was hard and I made it through.”
- “I’m still healing and I’m proud of my effort.”
- “I want more support and I can name what’s already helping.”
That kind of gratitude doesn’t deny pain—it gives you a stronger foundation beneath it.
A simple holiday practice: “Once, I hoped for this.”
Epicurus invites us to remember: some of what we have now used to live in the future as a wish.
Try this gentle reflection—no perfection required:
Once, I hoped for…
- a safe place to live
- a calmer morning routine
- a job I could handle
- a partner who tries
- a friend who checks in
- a child’s laughter
- a second chance
- a therapist, tools, or language for what I’m going through
- a moment of quiet
Then add:
Today, I have… (even if it’s imperfect, even if it’s small)
This isn’t about convincing yourself everything is great. It’s about reclaiming the goodness that’s already present—so it doesn’t get overshadowed by what’s next.
Heading into the new year: goals with gratitude, not pressure
New Year’s resolutions often start with critique: “I need to fix myself.” But lasting change grows better from compassion than from shame.
If you’re setting intentions, consider starting here:
- Name what you want—without making yourself wrong.
“I want more peace” lands differently than “I’m failing at life.” - Choose one small practice that supports your nervous system.
A short walk. A slower morning. Less doom-scrolling. More sunlight. More water. More boundaries. - Let gratitude be your fuel, not your checklist.
Gratitude isn’t another task. It’s a way to stay connected to what matters while you grow.
A grounded intention might sound like:
“I want to ask for help sooner.”
“This year, I want to feel more present in my relationships.”
“I want to build steadier habits that support my mental health.”
“I want to respond to myself with more kindness.”
If the season feels heavy, you’re not alone
For many people, the holidays bring up old patterns: family stress, grief, financial pressure, social anxiety, conflict, or the ache of unmet expectations. If you’re feeling that weight, it doesn’t mean you’re doing the season wrong. It means you’re human.
Support can help—especially when you’re ready to shift patterns, strengthen coping skills, improve communication, or simply feel less alone in what you’re carrying.
A closing wish from Desert Peace Therapy
As the year turns, we hope you can pause long enough to notice something true:
Some part of your life today was once something you hoped for.
May you enter the new year with steadier breath, softer self-talk, and room for both gratitude and growth.
From all of us at Desert Peace Therapy—happy holidays, and may the new year bring you relief, meaningful connection, and mindful wellbeing.
If you’d like support heading into the new year—whether you’re navigating anxiety, relationship stress, parenting challenges, or burnout—Desert Peace Therapy is here. We offer in-person and telehealth sessions in Las Vegas. Reach out to get started.
Find inner peace through our therapy services
Experience unmatched well-being
Leave a Reply